Newsgroups: alt.pub.dragons-inn
From: arsmith@nyx.cs.du.edu (Alan Smith)
Subject: [NTY] <sings> "I will follow him..."
Message-ID: <1993Jul31.163345.1308@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu>
Date: Sat, 31 Jul 93 16:33:45 GMT

Palandun climbed out of the hole.  "Jees." He said, rolling on his back
and appreciating the sunlight, "I don't want to do that for a while.  Lesee,
He sat up, "Here camelcamelcamelcamel!  Heeere camel!"  He began drifting
about in search of his ride back to Alamatar.

Palandun rode into town and stopped off at the camel rental shoppe.  The owner
was a large man with two wives, who were arguing in the back room.
  "I brought your camel, can I have my deposit back?" he asked.
  "You're three days late."
  "I never competed with you!  I always gave up time so you could be with
him!" (from the back)
  "Well, I was busy."
  "Oh yeah?  What about that time we were in bed and you barged in and 
interrupted us?!" (ftb)
  "Apparently too busy to feed it.  I need that money to make up for your 
neglect."
  "*I WAS GOING INTO LABOR*!"
  "Rats.  And I was going to rent two camels this time."
  "Some labor, you gave birth to a potato!"
  "My son is *not* a potato!  You take that back!"  A short, squat kid chose
that moment to walk in, cross between Palandun and the owner, grab something
to eat, cross again, and walk out.  He did bear some resemblance to a potato,
but Palandun would have pegged him more for a yam.
  "They way you treated the last one?  Not likely.  I have a slug you can
rent."
  "All right, I'm sorry, your son's not a potato.  He looks more like a yam."
  "I can't really chase anybody on a slug." Palandun said.
  "That's not my problem.  You should learn to take better care of your         
animals."
  "Hey!  Put that knife down!"
  Knife?
  "Um, I hate to shred the negotiations, but your wife is about to kill your
other wife."
  "Really?"  They both listen to the scuffle for a while.  "Drat.  I suppose
I'd better go stop them."  He strode into the back room, Palandun close on
his heels.

  Disarming an irate wife can be deceptively simple given a few simple          
assumptions: she's not trying to kill you, you're stronger than she is, and
she doesn't know you're there until it's too late.  The owner strode in, 
grabbed one woman's knife arm at the wrist, pried the knife loose, and pitched
it to palandun, who cut himself on the finger.
  "Now, girls.  I want you to be extra special good while I'm gone."
  "Gone?" They chorused, while Palandun wondered the same thing.
  "Yes, gone.  I'm going with my good friend...er..."
  "Palandun"
  "Palandun.  We're going off in search of a friend of his.  Now, if you
both be sweet while I'm away, I'll see if I can't drag out the rack when I
get home."  They both squeeled with glee, and dashed off on some miscallaneous
errand he sent them on.
  "Just one problem," Palandun said, "I didn't invite you and I'm not
sure I want you along."
  "If you want the camels, you'll take me."
  "You're not the only camel rental shoppe in Alamatar you know."
  "No.  But by now they all know what you did to the last one."
  "I set the dang thing free, is it my fault he tried to eat sand?  Not
like there wasn't fodder there anyway.  Beside, I don't know where I'm going
or when I'll get there."