Newsgroups: alt.pub.dragons-inn
From: arsmith@nyx.cs.du.edu (Alan Smith)
Subject: [NTY] Trying to leave at the wrong time.
Message-ID: <1993Aug1.222325.14426@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu>
References: <1993Aug1.044159.16827@midway.uchicago.edu>
Date: Sun, 1 Aug 93 22:23:25 GMT

  'By all accounts, Alamatar is a perfectly charming city, most of the time.
However, the days when the Silk Road Convoy comes in change it into something
like a cross between a Camquevan Festival and an orcish rape-raid, with the 
Generican town square market thrown in for kicks.'  --The Memoirs of
Palandun Lintesul.

  "My God, this is chaos!" Palandun shouted at Shagrat, the Camel-renter.
  "No, thursday!" Shagrat shouted back.  Palandun gave up on verbal             
communications and hand signed: 'Go in there where it's quiet.'  They
entered a nearby tavern, where the activity was down to earthquake proportions.
  "_Ra-kesh_, is it always like this when the convoy comes in?" Palandun asked.
  "No, sometimes it gets loud." Shagrat said, grinning.  Palandun, who despite
his education and experience was still somewhat of a country boy, had to work
hard to figure out he was joking.  He managed to force a return grin.
  "Lets stay here for a spell until it dies down." Palandun suggested.  Shagrat
seemed to think this a reasonable suggestion, so they hung out, ate and drank,
caught the floor show, and generally waited.  Shagrat managed to bait one of
his friends from the convoy into joining them, and they swapped news about
their various corneres of the world until the cameldriver dropped a little      
tidbit about unrest in Parahan.  "They're trying to throw off the Rameshander
yoke."  Palandun was under the impression that they already had, in the person
of the Il-Shar, who at last report was still refusing to pay tribute or
homage to the Shaheran.  He stated as much.  "You're right but you're wrong."
the driver replied, "The Il-Shar does govern Parahan, but the settled 
Parahanders control most of the actual land, and they are obedient to the
Shaheran."
  "So the barbarian tribes are trying to take over the agricultural areas of
Parahan by force." Palandun said, and immediately found himself on the horns
of a dilemma.  One of Palandun's duties as ambassador was to report on the
developments in his territory, as fully and completely as he could.  Another
of his duties was to report on the developments in his territory, as speedily
as he could.  In Alamatar, he could not do both.  Finding out the whole story
involved either staying in Alamatar or going into Parahan, and a speedy
report meant a return to Generica, where the MSGM&P had the abilities to reach
Bismania in something like a good time.
  Palandun resorted to a tactical docterine: "When offered the choice between
attacking from the east or from the west, attack from the north."
  "BARKEEP!  Pen and paper!" He shouted, "Shagrat, I need to send a bonded
courier to Generica with a message.  You know one?"
  "Of course.  Davvash!  When do you make your next run to Pashar?"
  "Tomorrow."
  "Perfect, my friend has a message he needs to get to generica in a hurry,
can you help it along?"
  "Certainly." The barkeep delivered pen and paper and Palandun frantically
set to work, first dictating the instructions to the courier ("To go to the
Most Splendid Guild of Messangers and Porters, for delivery to Bismanian
ethernet _as is_.  Charge to account of Palandun Lintesul.")
  The second message was pure gibberish.  After being assured that it was
indeed what he wanted to send, the courier put it in his pouch and strode
off with his payment.

In a few weeks, bismanian citizens entering their town halls would find the
following document in the 'new arrivals' box.

To all Bismanian citizens: