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From: hilanse@wkuvx1.bitnet (Wonko The Sane)
Newsgroups: alt.pub.dragons-inn
Subject: [WQ] Wonko's QUESTions.
Message-ID: <1993Oct14.185651.8026@wkuvx1>
Date: 14 Oct 93 18:56:51 CDT
Organization: Western Kentucky University, Bowling Green, KY
Lines: 86

     Athorbalo looked into Wonko's nearly vacant eyes, wondering why
exactly, she had fallen in love with the sotted viking. Her instincts
told her to keep away from him, but her heart had an altogether
different idea. In the end, she followed her heart, and she
occasionally wished that she hadn't. He blinked, looking at the right
hand corner of her mouth, wondering why it was turned down.

     The Beast flew through the night, skimming the tops of the
clouds. It was fast, but the sunrise was faster, quickly closing the
gap between the Beast and the fiery light that marked a new dawn on
Nexus. It plunged into a vertical dive that rocketed it to the
surface, swooping into the dark caves in a long-lost portion of a
dwarven stronghold. To sleep and dream of the death of Wonko.

     Wonko shook himself from his daze. He stood up from the bed, and
then fell promptly over the Night Lizard that always seemed to be
where Wonko's feet wanted to be. He continued his fall, too dazed to
catch himself. His head hit the wall, imbedding his horned helmet, and
rendering the viking immobile. Athorbalo sighed, grabbed the can
opener from the kitchen, and extricated her lover from the wall. As he
stood, he said to her, "Are you sure there's nothing in the trenches?"
She thought deeply, wondering what method for letting him know he was
incoherent would work best. She replied, "Only on every alternate
Wednesday." He nodded, and hugged her. Wonko turned around, walked to
the door and outside, completely naked.

      Athorbalo patiently waited for Wonko's return, after a few
moments, he ran back inside yelling vehemently. "The villagers have
gone berserk, twenty old ladies just attacked me with rotten tomatoes,
and tried to capture me with a bathrobe. Athorbalo merely nodded,
looking him up and down slowly, emphasizing particularly taboo areas
with her piercing stare. "What are you looking at?", he asked,
studying himself closely, and, realizing his mistake, stomped into the
closet without saying a word.

      Minutes after Wonko's entry into the closet, he walked into the
bedroom in full Pseudo-Quasi-Ultra-Viking garb, the biking shorts were
tight, the sunglasses were dark, the trenchcoat was flapping, and his
dented helmet sat atop his head with a fashionable tilt. Wonko smiled
at Athorbalo, kissed her, and then walked out, carefully stepping over
the Night Lizard on the threshold.

      Enn Piecy sat in the darkest corner of the Inn, chatting amiably
with Floth, his close friend and business associate, who also happened
to be a dead chicken. Small clouds of mist circled his ankles, and his
cracked voice wafted across the Inn, insinuating itself into the
conversations af all who were present. His stooped form jiggled
visibly when one of Floth's seemingly endless supply of jokes hit its
mark on Enn's sense of humor. His form stopped jiggling when a strange
being paused and rapped on the table. Wonko regarded the seer
questioningly, wondering why he was being looked at as though his head
was placed upside down on his body.

      "Sit, and drink, bearded one.", cackled Enn, "You have traveled far
to.."
 
  "Two blocks.", Said Wonko.

  "You have traveled a short distance, to converse with me, Enn Piecy,
Seer of all Seers", he continued.

  "I have traveled a short distance, to converse with you, Enn Piecy,
because you are the only discount Seer in Generica."

  "You are not wise, Wonko, only a fool would insult me, and my powerful
assistant, Floth.", Piecy growled.

"I did not insult the dead chicken.", Wonko smiled.

  Flustered, Enn pulled back his hood, revealing his youthful features,
"Okay, viking, what do you want, and how badly do you want it?"

  "I want to know why I've got a quest to go on, where it leads, who it
involves, and when I should leave."

  Enn grinned from ear to ear, then whispered to his chicken friend,
when he was done, he looked up at Wonko. "That knowledge could be
quite expensive, but I will be nice, this time, a pitcher of ale, on
your tab, will do nicely."

  Wonko caled the order to the 'tend and then sat, watching intently
as Piecy looked into a crystal ball, and Wonko's future.

(C)1993 Piecy by Piecy
Vikings Go To Mars, But Never Visit The Moon